By Kristelle Bechayda
As much as we find ourselves wishing our little ones won’t grow up, there will come a time when we need to teach them how to be self-sufficient. Being independent is a life skill every child has to learn but for most parents, letting go of their little ones is easier said than done.
Just recently, actress and mom LJ Reyes shared on Instagram how she teaches her nine-year-old son Ethan Akio or Aki how to be independent. According LJ, the act has to start from the parents themselves. “It became clearly important that it roots from the parents’ initiative to build habits consistently like giving them simple tasks to finish or setting as an example of discipline,” she says.
). Moreso, how do you train your kids to become independent? It became clearly important that it roots from the parents’ initiative to build habits consistently like giving them simple tasks to finish or setting as an example of discipline. But along with it, parents MUST also build the trust between them and their children. That with or without you by their side, they know that they can count on you. How do you do this? 1. Give them the gift of time. — talk to them, do tasks with them 2. Encourage intrinsic motivation — motivation from within. Giving rewards work but what would eventually help them become independent is letting them practice that not every single action gain a tangible reward. Give them hugs and words of affirmation instead! 3. Not everyone matures at the same time. — it is a combination of nature and nurture. Help your kids improve their weaknesses and flourish their strengths. 4. Make sure that they are healthy not just emotionally but physically and mentally as well! Imagine how difficult it is to raise a child! So glad I was there yesterday to know that I’m not the only one learning parenting through trial and error. These reminders would help a lot para maachieve natin ang mga #BiboPanaloMOMents! Pero mas panalo si Aki ang saya saya nya kahapon! Nakapaglaro sya with other kids kaya paguwi namin walang katapusan nyang sinasabing “Thank you Mom for this day!”❤️ Panalo!!! (Swipe left for extra sweetness!)
Apart from that, the actress also stresses the importance for them to be trusted by their children. “Parents must also build trust between them and their children, that with or without you by their side, they know that they can count on you,” she adds.
Gaining a child’s trust might be easy, but it’s a different case when you try to assure them you will be by their side as they explore their independence. LJ lists these reminders to help parents strengthen that rapport with their child:
- Give them the gift of time. — talk to them, do tasks with them
- Encourage intrinsic motivation — motivation from within. Giving rewards work but what would eventually help them become independent is letting them practice that not every single action gain a tangible reward. Give them hugs and words of affirmation instead!
- Not everyone matures at the same time. — it is a combination of nature and nurture. Help your kids improve their weaknesses and flourish their strengths.
- Make sure that they are healthy not just emotionally but physically and mentally as well!
“Imagine how difficult it is to raise a child! So glad I was there yesterday to know that I’m not the only one learning parenting through trial and error. These reminders would help a lot para maachieve natin ang mga #BiboPanaloMOMents!” she ended.
Aki is LJ’s son with actor Paolo Avelino. She also has a ten-month-old daughter named Summer Ayanawith current partner and fellow actor Paolo Contis.
See more at: Manila Bulletin
